Pretty Sure This Doesn't Have a Point...

You know how everyone is always telling you that timing is everything? I really think that's true.
I also think it's true that if you try hard enough, timing is nothing.
But when you reach that moment, that deciding factor, where you pick if you are going to put in the effort, or if you are going to let that person, that opportunity, that chance, go- that's what really is everything.
That choice is what is going to shape your future. Sometimes, that person, man, you can't help it. You put absolutely everything into them and you work your butt off to the point where all you have is inside of them now. I'm pretty sure that's what you call an unhealthy relationship.
But, looking at that choice...it is so terrifying. It wraps its arms around you and you can't move and you wouldn't ever want to because that person, that one in billions seems worth it. No matter what you lose, or what you give up, you are invested and letting go of them is not something you're willing to do.
So what happens when they let go of you?
I am going to be very brutally honest as I tell you that it is the shittiest thing another person could probably do to you. Just stop talking, start lying, acting embarrassed of you. If there was a time to lose yourself, this would be that moment. In fact, if you're in that deeply, you probably lost yourself a long time ago.

Telling you where I am going with these thoughts would be completely futile. I just know that I'm very scared of what's going on. High school is the best times of your life for about 4% of the population. The rest? We spend those years just trying to slip through without getting too emotionally damaged or trying to kill ourselves.
Body hair and heartbreak is those four years in a nutshell. Talk about a reason to be frustrated with your life! Now, lets toss in some details from my own, self-proclaimed genius (not really) of a mind.

High school is this huge swamp of people who are more confused than adults or children. They are all totally unsure of who they really are, what they're doing with their life, and couldn't tell you up from down most of the time. They feel alone, confused, horny, dorky, happy, sad, and a million other things in a day. Now, stick several hundred people like this in a building for 7 hours a day and tell me what you think you'd discover. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.  How in the crap are you supposed to choose the path for the rest of your life when you're dealing with a bunch of immature crazy people? I couldn't tell you.

Basically, my timing sucks, and I don't want to get heartbroken, and I don't want to hurt anyone, and I can't fail school because then I'll ruin my own life over a boy who I didn't even like that much.

Yes. I am completely certain this had no point.
Except to blurt all my crap.
Sorry.